He loves me, he loves me not...
This is going to be a little different from my normal blogs. It was originally a lesson designed for youth group, but I think it has a practical application for everyone so I decided to share it here.
A little preface: Another lady and I lead a high school small group of about 10-15 girls at our church on Tuesday night. A few weeks ago we handed out note cards and told the girls if they had any questions about the Bible or their faith to write them down. We kept it anonymous and encouraged them to ask anything; no topic was off limits. Being that they are high schoolers, we did get a few silly question like “what is your favorite donut?” or “how do you feel about Cardi B?” We did however get some really good questions too. Questions about depression, truth, love, and trust. Honestly some questions are going to be very difficult to answer, but I am so proud that they asked. In no particular order we decided to start answering them one at a time. We started with the question: “How do I know if God loves me?”
Complete disclosure, when I first read this question I rolled my eyes. Seriously? He died for you. How much more proof do you need? But then I prayed for an attitude adjustment and guidance on how to answer this question in a way the girls would relate.
I started thinking well how do we know anyone loves us, like parents/guardians, other family members, boyfriends/girlfriends, friends, etc. Then I googled “does he love me quiz”. As juvenile as taking an internet quiz to see if a boy likes you sounds, a lot of the questions were surprisingly relevant. I read through several of these quizzes and picked 18 appropriate questions and made my own quiz (a copy of the quiz is below this paragraph). We started small group by asking the girls to think of someone who loves them. It could be a boyfriend or a boy they liked, but it could also be a family member or friend. Then we passed out the quiz and asked them to answer the questions based off the person they picked. If you have time, think of a person right now that loves you and answer the questions below.
Do they speak to you?
YES NO
Do they ever reject you?
YES NO
Do they talk about the future?
YES NO
Are they honest with you?
YES NO
Do they share about their past or personal details about their life?
YES NO
Do they say I love you?
YES NO
Do they get jealous?
YES NO
Do they complement you?
YES NO
Do they give you things/provide for you?
YES NO
Do they notice little things that make you unique?
YES NO
Do they truly know you?
YES NO
Have they introduced you to family or important people in their life?
YES NO
Do they care for you when you are sick?
YES NO
Do they comfort you when you are sad/depressed?
YES NO
Can you talk to them about anything?
YES NO
Do they notice when you are worried?
YES NO
Do they protect you?
YES NO
Do they make sacrifices for you?
YES NO
After the girls finished the quiz we explained the point. Basically, that these are quantitative ways society measures if someone loves you or not. So using these same questions let’s see what the Bible says on if God loves us.
Do they speak to you?
In the past God spoke to our ancestors through the prophets at many times and in various ways, but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed heir of all things, and through whom also he made the universe. Hebrews 1:1-2
For this question I also had an article I referenced. Link
We had a short side discussion on how God speaks to us. The girls actually named seven of the eight ways God speaks to us that the article had listed.
Do they ever reject you?
For the LORD will not reject his people; he will never forsake his inheritance. Psalm 94:14
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6
Do they talk about the future?
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11
Are they honest with you?
God did this so that, by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled to take hold of the hope set before us may be greatly encouraged. Hebrews 6:18
Do they share about their past or personal details about their life?
That the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give to you a spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of Him. Ephesians 1:17
Do they say I love you?
“LOVE” appears 500-600 times in the Bible (depends on translation)
The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness. Jeremiah 31:3
Since you are precious and honored in my sight, and because I love you, I will give people in exchange for you, nations in exchange for your life. Isaiah 43:4
Do they get jealous?
Do not worship any other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God. Exodus 34:14
It was important here to explain the difference in the kind of jealousy God has for us verses the sinful envy we possess. God’s jealousy should be understood as Him guarding our relationship with Him. He is protecting what is His. When we get jealous, typically we are resentful of what someone else has. That is envy, and it is a sin.
Do they complement you?
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. Psalm 139:14
For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:10
Do they give you things/provide for you?
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19
Do they notice little things that make you unique?
But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Matthew 10:30
For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. Psalm 139:13
But now thus says the Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. Isaiah 43:1
Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith; if service, in our serving; the one who teaches, in his teaching; the one who exhorts, in his exhortation; the one who contributes, in generosity; the one who leads, with zeal; the one who does acts of mercy, with cheerfulness. Romans 12:6-8
God doesn’t just notice we are unique, He made us unique.
Do they truly know you?
I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me, John 10:14
But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart." 1 Samuel 16:7
Have they introduced you to family or important people in their life?
So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus himself being the cornerstone, in whom the whole structure, being joined together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord. In him you also are being built together into a dwelling place for God by the Spirit. Ephesians 2:19-22
So we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. Romans 12:5
Do they care for you when you are sick?
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:29-31
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28
Do they comfort you when you are sad/depressed?
Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Matthew 5:4
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
Can you talk to them about anything?
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7
Do they notice when you are worried?
The Bible says do not fear ~365 times.
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? "And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you-you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:25-34
Do they protect you?
"Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me." Psalm 23:4
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. Isaiah 43:2
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10
Do they make sacrifices for you?
We obviously hung out on this questions for a while. We asked the girls what type of sacrifices the people that love them have made for them and also what sacrifices they have made for people they love. We got some good answers. Money, time, doing something they don’t like to do for the other person. One girl said they let her eat their food, which I totally could relate because I don’t like to share food. Then we asked them what the biggest sacrifice you can give is. Most said time. We had one of the girls read John 15:13.
Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends. John 15:13
We asked the question again: “What is the biggest sacrifice you can give?” Now they all answered, “Your life”. Bingo.
So how many of you are willing to die for the person you love? Most of them said yes. Okay, how many people would you be willing to die for? Most said one. Well Jesus didn’t just die for one person. He died for everyone. Now how many of you would be willing to die for someone who hated you? Silence. Well that is exactly what Jesus did. He came down to this world knowing He would be brutally murdered by the very people He came to save. Then He rose again to offer us eternal life.
In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. 1 John 4:10
